Croaker
| Former Alliances | UCN, TIE |
|---|
Croaker is a very famous leader who has a strong history with Fingolfin and the UCN, as well as TIE. He is also widely known for his humorous parodies and stories such as Tour of Alliance Talk, Earth Crime and Punishment and Changes in Earth Tax Code.
He was first well known as a personal friend of Fingolfin and an important coleader or vice-president of the UCN. Later on, during Fingolfin's first retirement, he also became the sole president, although Fingolfin eventually returned. Later on, The Infernal Elite (TIE) owner Inferno offered leadership of TIE to Croaker following Doobie's dismissal. Croaker accepted, and he took over TIE while Fingolfin remained UCN president. This led to close ties between the two powerhouses.
Later on, after UCN was destroyed by RD for several resets, they retired. Eventually, TIE and Croaker had their own problems with these cheaters which led to a "indefinite war" declared by Croaker on RD. Unfortunately, they were devastated by bots for many resets, and eventually, Croaker was usurped while another leader surrendered publically to RD, allowing full site access to RD leaders in the process.
Contents |
Famous posts
Tour of Alliance Talk
Main article: Tour of Alliance Talk
A humourous anecdote in which Croaker takes a newbie on a virtual tour of AT, which is modelled after a large building. Contains many references to prominent AT characters and playful jabs at other clans.
A small excerpt:
- Newbie-"Wow, there's a lot of people in here. Who are these kids in the front?"
- Croaker-"Those are all leaders of small clans. They spend their whole day in here, trying to recruit each other. You should see it when a real alliance leader walks by on his way upstairs...they all rush to the window and shout 'I want to establish relations with your alliance! We're going to be powerful this round!'...it's a riot."
- Newbie-"I can just imagine. So, who are all those guys in the back? The ones that all look alike, and don't seem to ever say anything?"
- Croaker-"Oh, those are multis. Ignore them...Mehul does."
- Newbie-"Ok, one last question here...who's that guy standing by himself in the corner yelling 'JOIN KILL!'?"
- Croaker-"Oh, that's Lance. Come on, we better get going before he starts into his 'TGA Sux!' routine."
Earth Crime and Punishment
Main article: Earth Crime and Punishment
Another humourous tale in which Mehul Patel imprisons 17 alliance leaders in an effort to find out what FoG is.
UCN Seeks Dance Partner
Wow, we didn't get hit this much by SOL during the war last round. And no offense to SOL intended, either...there are actual real life farms that don't get farmed as much as we're being farmed this round. Apparently everyone thinks that we're sick of fighting after last round, and they can hit us with impunity. Wrong.
Effective immediately, UCN is holding open auditions for our first dance partner of the round. If you and your alliance is interested in dancing with us, please continue to grab us excessively and your name will be entered as an official contestant.
I'm tired today and getting too cutesy. Let me be blunt: we're inches away from jumping all over someone. We've been hit so much already that it may be too late for us to have a realistic chance at #1 this round, so the least we can do is ruin someone else's round too. If any of you think this is just an idle threat, then by all means keep hitting us and find out.
Croaker CoPresUCNChanges in Earth Tax Code
A few weeks ago, Ruth and I were chatting, and she mentioned that she was doing her taxes. I made a comment about being glad I didn't have to do a return for my country, she came right back with another line, and before we knew it we had enough earth-tax related material to justify a post. We went back-and-forth on the format for a while (initially attempting to come up with something for every line on a 1040, but there were just too many dead areas), until we finally settled on this 'Tax Code Changes' format. Even though Ruth is being kind enough to give me equal billing on this post, in reality she did 70-80% of the work on it, and deserves at least that much of the credit for it. Please feel free add any items we overlooked, and enjoy :) C R Block User ID: 1007814 Mar 12th 9:29 PM Tax time is almost here and we at C & R Block would like to make you aware of the changes in tax law as they pertain to your Earth 2025 country. Any questions should be directed to the Strategy Page on the Earth Boards. As with the Internal Revenue Service, please do not expect a reply during your lifetime, especially when directed to Mehul Patel.
First off, all tax forms must be completely filled out and submitted prior to April 15, 2000, 23:59 game time. And they must contain your real name. Those filing under names like p, viper, or asdfg will be returned.
If you have questions concerning how you should file, perhaps these guidelines would help:
Single - don’t lie. If you play a country in both games A and B, you cannot use this. Married filing jointly - this can be used by King Arthur and Lady Guinivere only. Married filing separately - if you have an account in games A and B or tourney, you can use this. Head of the Household - all FFA players must use this option. Widow(er) with dependants - use this if your main country got killed but you still have your land farm/baby spy country left.
Also, those with multiple accounts in game A that do not declare all of their countries, the Earth Court is currently tracking you and you will be prosecuted on AT and put on the kill list for tax evasion and rules violations.
Now lets go over some of the deductions that have been added or changed this tax year.
CHARITABLE CONTRIBUTIONS
1. Carrying a research alliance with a non-techer is no longer a valid charitable contribution. You can however deduct the cost of offensive and defensive allies under insurance in the personal deductions section.
2. Sending FA to a war restart outside of your alliance can be deducted as charity. You may want to think twice before claiming this deduction, as the cost of defending yourself on AT may outweigh the actual tax savings.
3. Foreign aiding someone within your alliance will still be considered charitable contributions. However, in the case of a foreign aid chain, only the aid received by the last country can be considered under this deduction. The other 29 countries involved must report the aid they receive as income. Also the value of the soon to be deleted countries cannot be declared as a business loss.
EDUCATIONAL EXPENSES. Just a quick note. It seems that many of you do not take advantage of these deductions. It may be that you are not aware of them but for a majority of players, we find they simply do not learn from their mistakes :)
1. If you reply to an in-game message to send your user name and password to an web-based e-mail account, the value of your hacked country can be deducted as an educational expense.
2. Any favors paid to Gramberto for "teaching you to make it to the top 10" are also deductible as an educational expense. However, any favors owed should be considered a student loan.
3. Losses incurred from all the retals you received from landgrabbing HAN could also fall under educational expenses. That would depend on if you learned not to grab them again or not.
4. Losses incurred from running out of food or money can be claimed as an educational expense one time only. See comment above about learning from your mistakes.
5. Time and advertising costs associated with constantly reminding alliances that your training tag is indeed part of your alliance (RAG1 and RAGxSTYX for example) can also be deducted under educational expenses.
6. Attacks by PS are now considered business trips and are tax deductible. Losses suffered from sending your tanks and troops on a PS, especially during war, can also be included under educational expenses but could be excluded under the stupidity clause. That would depend on whether your country is still alive or not when your military is due back.
PERSONAL EXPENSES
1. Expenses incurred for curing bioterrorism spy ops now count as Medicare expenses. The cost of any medical tech you purchase can also be deducted under this category.
2. Negative cash flow now makes you eligible to receive the earned income credit. The loss of turns not played because of goods not selling cannot be deducted.
3. The tax bracket for any income over $2.1 billion has been raised to 100%. However, once you are over the $2.1 billion mark, you may qualify for welfare. We suggest keeping a close eye on your income level as to avoid any surprises when your military sells.
4. Earthquakes are now considered an act of Mehul Patel and losses can no longer be deducted. This also includes the burning of oil fields and droughts causing losses in food production.
5. When attacking a country much bigger than you, any losses suffered may be declared as gambling losses.
BUSINESS DEDUCTIONS
1. Alliances merging will be treated as corporate takeovers. Simply changing the name does not qualify. CORE changing to AGE or Forest to DFA for example. Also adding extensions to the alliance name such as xFoGx or xTF does not qualify you for this deduction.
2. Alliance officers are now allowed to take a credit for day care expenses for any time spent consulting members on non-Earth related issues. This includes everything from dating issues to problems with parental units.
3. Deductions for advertising expenses on AT are now limited to a total of 10 posts per week per 100 members in your alliance. However, spamming the public boards of any alliance does not qualify for this deduction. Certain taxpapers have been exluded from this deduction due to over-usage: Fluff, Ghost, any Observer, and all unauthenticated posters cannot take this deduction.
4. Beer, crack brownies and porn can only be included as an entertainment expense when used to entice new members into your alliance. The offering of various high level positions such as officer or division leader for recruitment purposes are considered kick-backs and can no longer be deducted.
5. Stolen tags cannot be declared as a business loss. We are however evaluating lost acerage due to being grabbed for not wearing your regular tag as being a valid deduction.
6. The taxes paid on your jets and tanks should be included in your business vehicle expenses. The taxes paid on troops should be listed under payroll expenses. Turrets are subject to capital gains taxes.
7. Taxes paid on your land should continue to be deducted under real estate taxes. During war however, you may be able to claim your new parking lot as a business loss.
8. Lost income from the fall of the tech market can no longer be written off as depreciation. However, income obtained from purchasing military on your private market and selling on the public market must be reported as capital gains.
9. Selling under market value in order to get enough cash to play your turns should be considered as depreciation. Losses from selling on your private market however, may fall subject to the stupidity clause.
We here at C & R Block realize that all these changes in tax law can be quite confusing. Please contact us at 1-800-4nohelp or on our web site at www.as-confused-as-you-are.com.
